A belief is a point of view, a perspective and way of seeing things.
When we believe something we tend to only see the things that support our belief and ignore those things that don't. In other words, believing is seeing or when we believe it, we see it.
When belief is erroneous it can cause great suffering.
There are so many decisions to make in life.
We think that freedom is having lots of choices, but when we have too many options, we then feel confined by our indecision. Too much choice is a blessing and a curse.
Sometimes, when I have difficulty choosing between different options, I resort to what I call the “Ultimate Context”. A context is a point of view or a framework in which to consider a problem.
For many people the world seems to be getting more insecure and crazy.
We are feeling susceptible to the disruption on the planet and it's adding to the overwhelm we experience in our lives. The outer stress can infiltrate our world frustrating our attainment of what we dearly want.
Some people have a vague feeling that they are not in the driver’s seat in their lives. We might conclude we are hopeless to change anything and we just have to go “with the flow”…let go and let god as they say.
I've always thought that we live in a "Have-Do-Be" world, a culture in which many people are stuck in thinking that the more they have the happier they will be.
But there is a catch; to have more, we "have-do" do more, to get what we want, to hopefully 'be" in that happiness.
The having and the doing often take a long time. Some get stuck in the “do-do” and do not enjoy the journey along the way, continually stuck in the unhappiness of not-having.
Happiness seems only to be enjoyed
when the goal of all the doing is achieved.
Even worse is the trap of equating the sense of self worth with what
they have (net worth equals self-worth) Those in this prison cannot even rest and enjoy their accomplishments because they are not doing something to have more.
They cannot be grateful for having what they have. They need more, or something better or different than others. And since the having is not enough, the doing to have more, is endless.
I don't know about you but there are many times during the day I notice my mind acting like an errant tourist on vacation wandering up and down the streets of fantasy gazing into the shop windows of the future and the past, pulling me out of the focus of what I need to do in the present moment.
Sometimes the tourist becomes a terrorist torturing me with old thoughts of uncompleted conversations, ancient regrets or future worries that keep re-cycling over and over in my head.
They can seriously impact my peace of mind. Sometimes it feels like I am spinning my wheels and getting stuck in a rut that gets deeper and deeper making it even more impossible to escape.
We all make mistakes in close, personal or career relationships. These mistakes can hurt others deeply and destroy in an instant the trust we have so carefully developed over a long time.
We all come into relationships wounded and vulnerable. Sometimes we do things that are insensitive out of our own unhealed pain or be unaware of how delicate our partners are around certain wounds that they are carrying.
We are not 100% fully conscious of others so it is inevitable that others can be hurt by our actions. It is part of being human but it must not be an excuse.
What we do in this situation can bring trust and even greater closeness back. On the other hand to ignore our transgression can ruin close relationships and friendships.
Three Powerful Words
Ever notice what happens when you ask a child to do something they don’t want to do? Their energy just suddenly seems to vanish and they drop to the floor and whine:
“I don’t want to do the dishes. I’m too tired”.
But when you say:
“Okay how about after you do the dishes, we go on the internet and download that Harry Potter movie you wanted to see again?”
Notice how suddenly the energy is back.
Where did it vanish? How did it come back?
Its always been there.
It comes and goes depending on our interest.
It’s the same with us.
When we are doing something in life we don’t want to do, the energy fades.
We have to push ourselves to do it.
If we push over and over again, we have to find external ways to get that energy back…
5 cups of coffee, double cream, double sugar.
Lots of vitamins
The whatever-hour energy drink
Then we have to take something to relieve some of the despair.
Lots of TV
Too many healthy dark chocolate bars (I speak from experience here)
The body can start to breakdown forcing it to do what is deflating the soul.
We get stuck in believing life is just a "dirty ritz a-frats" meaningless game.
But out of this pain comes a turning point.
We start to search.
We decide to find to out what our lives are really all about, what really turns us on, what we should be really doing i.e. the BIG QUESTION:
Why am I here?
We find when we get clear on our life purpose, something really funky happens... our energy comes back. It’s what's called inherent motivation i.e. the impulse to create our life arises from the inside.
Not the outside.
Where there wasn't energy...now there is.
Having a purpose is just naturally satisfying because we are magnetically drawn to want to accomplish it. It excites and energies us.
We become more engaged. Life has meaning as we see that we consistently accomplish the steps toward our purpose. The best parts of ourselves emerge to face and overcome the barriers that have defeated us in the past.
We become more of who we truly are.
“He who has a why to live for can bear any how.” Frederick Nietzsche
I don’t know about you but to me one of the biggest regrets is to live not knowing why we are really alive. Imagine a person realizing this on their deathbed?
When we know our purpose, life can become a project worthy of our passion not a huge problem to avoid,
Hey and we can save a lot on those energy drinks!
If this in some way relates to you check out the Deep Calling retreat:
One of the hardest things to cultivate in life is our relationships with friends, business colleagues and loved ones.
We can easily get upset with one another and when we do; our feelings are so tender and sensitive. We can get over-reactive and raise our voices and say things we regret or we can under-react and go silent and withdraw.
The Difficult Dance
It’s a difficult dance between communicating honestly and at the same time trying to not hurt others. It’s so easy to err in either direction even when we mean well. We may communicate our truth with too much emotional charge and hurt the one we love or hold back our real feelings and then feel that we have compromised ourselves.
Sometimes we think we know what is going on with others, we tell them and they feel judged.
Oppositely we can feel that others should somehow know what we are going through and
There is a certain clarity that has arrived from knowing you
You are a radiant gift
And do not realize that you are
The Breath of Life that speaks of profound joy and happiness
Innocent, yet lost in the world outside yourself
You long to be seen, yet you hide yourself
I see you because I am you
There will be no hiding…for you cannot hide from one who knows
It is time to remove the armor of your own thoughts of yourself
Release yourself from the thoughts that others have thrown upon you for they equal only to
the thoughts that your mind has created to hold you back.
It is only this that stops us all from going Home
From BEING in the Bliss of the all Knowing
Release the heart and stop the unfriendly chatter of the mind and BE HERE with me
Strip naked and expose your beauty
Lie next to me in the open field
And Trust the Love that shines upon you always
It has not forgotten you
You have forgotten it, along with your Self
Make a friend of your mind
Forgive yourself and all others
There is NO SHAME in this Love
It is free of Guilt and Shame
It only knows the “you” in the pureness of the Source of all life
There are no errors here
Trust is all you need.
(written after participating in an Enlightenment Intensive (aka Coming Home Retreat) in May 2017 near Vancouver
The Story of Your Heart
Tell me the story of your heart
It is much different than the other stories you have told
Its springs from the hills
Off in the forest
And flows to the valley
Through the coltsfoot, the fern and the wild ginger root
Through the bubbling pool
Where the whitetail deer quench their thirst,
To the deep pond
Where the brooke trout dart
And the cattails clamour
To hear the bullfrogs burp their blathering conversation.
I will sit by the edge
Gazing at the still cool water reflecting the evening stars
And revel... in the grandeur
Of who you are.
Russell Scott (05.2014)
“I discovered a bond linking myself with others, that we are all beings trapped within our minds trying to communicate our fears and need for love. I am becoming more loving, more real, more open, truthful and trustworthy”
—Doug Tyler- Real Estate Rep, Toronto, Ontario
- Let's Stop Believing - Just for One Day
- The Ultimate Context Tool for Making Decisions.
- Owning Your Own Universe Project
- Getting Unstuck from the Have-Do-Be World
- Getting Out of a Mind Rut - A Hilarious Approach
- The 3 Most Powerful Words to Heal a Relationship
- How Can You Have More Energy and Motivation?
- The Right Question When Things Go Wrong
- You Are a Radiant Gift
- Tell Me the Story of Your Heart